Obsolete

 

 

 

There are

a lot of things

I still don’t understand

 

Why

 

For instance

my heart seems

to crumble whenever I laugh

 

Why

 

Whenever I tell myself

don’t think about it

crimson still fills my mind

 

Sharp blades

 

Flickering fires

 

Embers that

want to consume me

 

Why does it feel like

 

Every time I utter

those three little words

it’s directed towards her

 

Or that

that missing something

is not you

it’s not a dimpled smile

or blue-grey eyes

 

It’s myself

and what you have given me

 

Memories

that keep me awake

as I try to decipher

dreams of us

 

I search for them

for those half decent smiles

verdant irises

witty remarks

 

 

Why is it that I no longer

understand my own mind?